Is High School Dating OK?

This is a great question to tackle, especially the week after Valentines Day. One of the challenges of addressing questions such as these is that there is not a passage in scripture that gives us a clear answer. Therefore, I think we need to reshape the question asking what is best for the grand story of my entire life rather than my momentary wants and desires.

Here is some other ways to look at the same question:
1) Does Dating glorify God?
2) What are the benefits and the temptations involved with dating?
3) If Nick and Kassie Roland can date in high school and get married…can’t it happen to me too?

Lets answer some of these…
Does dating glorify God? I think it can and it should. What I do know is that God called man and woman to be together in marriage. Therefore, we are going to be attracted to the opposite gender. I feel as though all things on earth can bring glory to God. In the same sense though, all things can steer us away from the Lord. I can play soccer to the glory of God. I can also let soccer become an idol, pulling my time, attention, and ultimately worship, away from the Lord and onto it. This same temptation of creating an idol can happen regarding dating. Dating can consume us so much that the Lord takes a distant second place. When this happens, as it often does, we steal God’s glory.
What are the benefits and the temptations involved with dating? If you were to put these two on a scale, I feel the temptations massively outweigh the benefits of teenage dating. Why? When I think through the potential benefits, the list includes: Fun, hang out, communication, companionship, preparation for marriage (churchy answer) and more. The issue with these is, everyone of these things can happen while in a group and without “dating somebody” which is where temptation often comes into play. Within our culture, dating alludes to privileges. Privileges such as intimacy, affection, and 1 on 1 time, are often the very things that get us into trouble. They are the things that we want, yet often lead to mistakes we later regret. As believers, we often draw lines of “how far is too far” but then tiptoe right up to the edge of that line. More often than not, our flesh is going to overpower our recently drawn line and we are going to fall into the heavy emotions of the moment. Result: our temptations just did a roundhouse kick to anything we once defined as “benefits”.
If Nick and Kassie Roland can date in high school and get married…can’t it happen to me too? Of course it can…it just rarely does. In fact, more often than not, I think dating prepares us more for divorce than it does marriage. We date somebody until we become disinterested, sick of them, or they do something that offends us. In this case…the answer is obvious: DUMP THEM. This molds our instincts that once we are tired of a person, we can just move onto the next. When and how does this get us ready for marriage? Nick and Kassie dated each other for 4 years, all the while saving themselves in purity for WHOEVER they would have married. It was just extra bonus that they were saving themselves for each other. I do think they are a great example of dating that worked, but they will tell you there were many bumps along the way that came from dating so young. NOTE: I have been in youth ministry for over 10 years and they are the only couple I have ever seen that has this story.
REALITY: there is a good chance the person your dating in Junior Hi or High School is not going to be the person you marry.

So…where do I go from here?
My opinion (which remember because it is not officially in the Bible, will remain an opinion) is that you can have very good, very deep relationship that prepares you for marriage, while not having the official title of “dating”. Why this? I think to often as soon as students become a pair, their “dating privileges” find a way of burying the moral and spiritual lines they have drawn. If your truest desire is to guard your heart and body, it is wise to avoid situations that could be cause temptation. So, hang out in groups…have a blast doing it. Don’t freak out about being attracted to somebody…we are designed to work like that! Use these opportunities however to develop your sense of boundaries, your skills of question asking, and your discipline of pure living.

~Deep thoughts by a Shallow guy~
mn

Overcoming Sexual Temptation

You might think it strange that the girl who has never had a boyfriend or even been on a date would be the one given the assignment to write the blog, “How do I as a Christian overcome sexual temptation?,” but I think it’s interesting that God really doesn’t care what season of life He has you in or where you stand with the opposite sex….we will always be called to live a life a purity, holiness & righteousness (and trust me, even single people deal with it).

I know most of the students/people who are asking this question are doing so because they might think there is a quick, couple-steps answer to how to “be better” when I am alone with my boyfriend/significant other. However, I would argue that the answer we are seeking lies in the nature of how we spend our time in thought, action or deed. I am brought back to Jesus’ powerful words in the gospels that say,

So if your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It’s better to enter eternal life with only one hand or one foot than to be thrown into eternal fire with both of your hands and feet. And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It’s better to enter eternal life with only one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.

What we watch, hear, think or spend our time doing, effects how we will respond in time of temptation, sexual or otherwise. Some questions to ask ourselves…how do I spend my time? And is it leading me to greater love, knowledge, understanding & desire for the Lord & His purposes? What am I watching or listening to that leads into my thought life? And what is the result of it?

You see, there will always be temptation. We live in a fallen world, one with sin and if sin wasn’t available then we wouldn’t be tempted, but we will be. It’s fact. So I think the better question to ask would be, “How do I as a Christian LIVE while sexual temptation is inevitable?”

I think Paul gives us a couple of pointers in light of our calling…

Romans 12:1-2
And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Philippians 4:6-8
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

As you seek Jesus, offer yourself to Him as a living sacrifice & allow Him to remake you, I promise that coping with sexual temptation will become easier. It won’t be gone, but it will make you smarter/wiser in how to take further steps in purity & holiness.

P.S. a guy/girl that deserves your time/heart/future will share this desire & goal with you even in the hard times. So if they don’t, get rid of them.

How can the Old Testament people be saved if there was no Jesus then?

This is a great question, one that is important to understand as we understand who Jesus is and what He did. Prior to answering this question though, I think there is some important truths to remember:
1) God is outside of time. Therefore what he does in an instant could actually play itself out over thousands of years.
2) It says (referring to Jesus) in Hebrews 13:8 “I am the same yesterday, today, and forever”.
When we exist inside of time, it’s hard to understand a God who is outside of it. Therefore, we accept it by faith. Believing this takes us a step closer to seeing how Jesus’ death can be the central act of all history. When sin entered the world through Adam, a plan of equivalent payment had to be made. This payment would be so great, and such an act of Love, that it would fulfill redemption of all people for all times. Therefore when Jesus died as the substitutionary atonement…it was not just for the sins that came after him, it was for the sins of everybody, who has ever lived.
2 Corinthians 5:14-15 addresses this well:
For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all, therefore all died; and He died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf.
Our first thing to note then is that all were included in the payment accomplished by Jesus’ death.
Another point of interest however is answering the question: was Jesus present? Many scholars, as they seek to understand the role of the trinity throughout time and text, point to names often used for either Father, Son, or Holy Spirit. For example, when a metaphor of dove is used, we assume that this is referring directly to the Holy Spirit. In a simple word study, we see the title of “Lord” in the New Testament as the primary title to depict Jesus’ role and authority. Interestingly enough, Lord is used often throughout the Old Testament in specific settings or stories. So where we know Jesus was not there in flesh, the spirit of the Lord is active. Most scholars refer to this “spirit of the Lord” as God the son, or the spirit of Jesus, as present. (example: Genesis 10-12)

Finally, I find it very unique that the disciples in the gospels knew what they were looking for in a messiah. Meaning: The gospel is explained thoroughly in the Old Testament! People awaited a Messiah who would take away their sins, being the ultimate payment against death. They lived in the same mode of redemption we do.

In summary, these are 3 good places to start. Christ’s death, by view and plan of God, paid for the sins of all because that is the way he purposed it. Secondly, if Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever, than we see his fingerprints not just in the gospels, but also throughout the Old Testament. And last, we trust that to be able to expect the Messiah, they had to know something of what he was going to be like. The Old Testament is as much a purposed account for the gospel as the New Testament is.

~Deep thoughts by a Shallow guy~
mn

Science and Faith: Part 1 - A Conversation

One of the most frequently asked questions is the question of how scientific discoveries affect our faith. Since we’re sticking to the “deep end” issues of the faith in the talks, we’re going to tackle this issue in the blog. I quickly figured out that one blog would not suffice for such a big issue. So it looks like we will get 3 blogs on the issue of faith and science. First, we’ll look at the big picture issue of how science and faith interact. Then we’ll move on to the questions of miracles and evolution.

For many centuries, there was not a clear divide between science and faith. Scholars were expected to study theology/science/math/philosophy all as one discipline. Then, during what we call the “enlightenment” people starting seeing science/math/philosophy as distinct from theology. Later science, math and philosophy would also separate into somewhat distinct disciplines. Since then, it has been a difficult question as to how science (or any other academic discipline) and faith should interact.

Ian Barbour has suggested 4 different ways they can interact (see Tim Keller’s Reason for God, chapter 6). On one end of the spectrum is all out war. In this view, faith and science are always in conflict. It’s always creationism versus evolution, faith versus reason, or scientific evidence versus religious belief. The assumption is that science and faith are enemies. On the other end is the idea that they have nothing to do with each other. People of this point of view think that religious beliefs and scientific information do not belong in the same conversation. Barbour proposes that a healthier response lies somewhere in between. Two other options include the idea that faith and science could either be integrated or at least that there should be a conversation between the two. I propose that one of these middle ground options is better. If God is the creator of the universe, then he is the creator of everything that scientists study. Surely faith and science are not enemies, and they cannot be wholly separate.

There is one more reason for there to be healthy interaction between faith and science. When Christians attack or ignore science, they often attack or ignore people who place their faith in science over Jesus. Though it is clearly untrue that all scientists are atheists, it is a community with many nonbelievers. Christians sacrifice a tremendous opportunity to have a healthy conversation about our faith with a people group who need such a conversation. Let’s quit attacking people who do not believe as we do, and let’s quit ignoring them. Rather, with a love of Christ and a faith in a Savior who is truth, let’s engage in a loving, grace filled dialogue.

More to come on science and faith…

For His glory and our joy,
nr

Hidden Thoughts

Canon and Apocrypha are two loaded terms that have significant meaning to our understanding of God’s Word. Canon literally means “a measuring rod.” God breathed scripture would be the “measuring rod” of which it is very important for us to listen and see what God is saying. When we read Colossians 1:17, it says, “God is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” By understanding this truth, the Canon of the scriptures meant that God was set before it all in order that He would give us clear truths. So, the Canon is a process in which God again used man to set His words and be placed in an order and bound book that we today know as the Holy Bible. There are several other writings that were left out of the Bible that had no need to be documented because it was evident that it was a writing that was not breathed of God as the other 66 books. These other writings are referred to as the Apocrypha. The word Apocrypha means “hidden” or “concealed” and we see them as “writings of unknown origin." Nowhere in these “other books” do we see the writers refer to the writing as inspired by God. These writings were not inspired by God, but simply the ideas and thoughts of man.
We must be able to answer questions of our own faith and when we face thoughts and discussions on how the scripture came to be, it is critical that we know answers. We trust that the work of the Holy Spirit will guide us as we journey through this mind series. Send us your thoughts and let us know what questions you may have.

From one follower of Christ to another,

Jarrett

Deep End/Shallow End

“If you dive into the shallow end of the Biblical pool, where there are many controversies over interpretation, you may get scraped up. But if you dive into the center of the Biblical pool, where there is consensus—about the deity of Christ, his death and resurrection—you will be safe. It is therefore important to consider the Bible’s core claims about who Jesus is and whether he rose from the dead before you reject it for its less central and more controversial teachings.” -Tim Keller (Reason for God)

Over the next several weeks as we discuss our inward series, we are going to be teaching about the “Deep End” issues such as: Inerrancy of Scripture, Goodness of God in Suffering, Predestination, Exclusivity of Christianity, and Sanctification. We will then be blogging about the “Shallow End” issues for your further research and discussion. We hope you are blessed by these critical conversations…we trust the Lord will use them as a key shaping season in your life!

~Deep thoughts by a Shallow guy~
mn

When Questions aren’t asked

This past Saturday, at halftime of the Liberty Bowl (Go Hogs…especially Tejada), we launched our INWARD series: Loving God with our mind. For 6 weeks we will discuss on Saturday nights some of the biggest faith questions that plague us, keep us awake at night, and cause general blank stares when asked. We will also blog on this very site whatever you have specific questions about. On Saturday, right between your 2nd and 3rd piece of pizza, we asked you to text in your biggest questions regarding the Christian faith. To our amazement, although 100+ people were in the room, we only received 6 texts. After much conversation, we as a Mosaic students staff team decided this would be the perfect blog to start us off with. The lack of questions led us to a few potential reasons:
1) People didn’t know what to ask
2) People are afraid to ask
3) People could care less
4) People are more interested in their pizza then the topic at hand
5) People don’t text

Considering that the vast majority present were students, we are going to assume that it’s not number 5, hope that its not number 4 (but know that’s likely for us as well), and therefore move directly to 1-2-3. If your silence reflected one of these, we want to both challenge and encourage you in the weeks to come. When Jesus promises the woman at the well that one day, worshipers will come to Him in spirit and truth, we take that to mean in the heart, soul AND the mind (John 4:7-26). Knowing God is as much comprehending Him with clarity (at least attempting too) as it is experiencing him with emotions.

For some of you, this will mean wrestling with these questions for the first time and actually teaching you the issues, thus guiding you in the questions you’ll have. For some of you, these 6 weeks will relieve you that you don’t need to be afraid to ask. It doesn’t mean you are foolish to have questions, but instead will show we are becoming more like Christ even in our pursuit of knowledge. And for those of you who don’t care, hopefully this will act as the spark to turn you off of yourself and onto the vast ocean of wisdom, spirituality, and LIFE that will never be had outside of Jesus Christ.

We hope you respond the same way the well-woman must have to Jesus’ worship remark. “Wow…true worship happens in spirit and truth. I wonder how I can do both”.

~Deep thoughts by a shallow guy~
mn